Lessons From the Professor (11 page)

“You knew who I was before you asked me to marry you,
Jackson.”

“I knew you were a dedicated student. I didn’t expect you to
keep that intensity after you graduated! I’m a doctor. I understand wanting to
get good grades and be top in your class. But at some point you have to make
time for others.”

“I did!”

“Not enough.”

“Then you should have said something.”

“When, Sutton?
I mean were
you ever planning on slowing down enough to actually plan a wedding and make it
down the aisle?”

“Yes! Unlike you, I don’t lie to the people I love.”

He shook his head. His full pink cupids-bow lips curled up
into a sneer.

“Listen,
Jackson
,
I’m sorry you came all this way for nothing.
 
I would never enter into a relationship with you again.
 
You’ve said your piece, and now this
conversation is over.”

She stood from the table, and turned to leave when his hands
clamped down around her wrist like a vise.

“Do you really think you can just dismiss me like some
errand boy?”

She blinked as he stood, towering above her with a dark
expression she’d never seen him wear before.

“You’ll take your hands off her if you know what’s good for
you.”

 
The silky voice made
her want to melt into a puddle.
 
Sutton
couldn’t help but grin as she glanced up and spotted
Sidney
standing a few feet away. He was
dressed smartly in a pair of pressed black slacks and a black button down. The
anger that flashed in his black eyes made her knees weaken, her nipples harden
and the juices gush between her legs like a fountain. She’d never seen him so
ruffled before, and the fact that it was due to her brought on an instant
arousal. Who knew she was the type to like to play damsel in distress from time
to time?

“Sutton, tell your supervisor everything is fine.”

“I am not her supervisor, and I told you to let go of her.”
He punctuated each word with a step closer.
 
Sutton took advantage of
Jackson
’s shock,
tugging her wrist free as she came to stand by
Sidney
. The feel of his large hand on the
small of her back was reassuring.

“Who is this, Sutton?”

“This is my boyfriend, Sidney.”

“Oh I see, the only one who’d put up with that cold fish act
of yours is an older gentleman who’s probably more than happy to be with a
younger woman.”

“I’ve never found Sutton to be cold in any way. It’s clear
to me the error must lie with past partners.
 
Younger men can be so rash. Only concerned with their own pleasure and
pursuits in life, they miss the prize that’s in front of them until it’s too
late to get it back.”

He spoke in a calm unaffected manner, yet his words cut like
a razor.
 
Silence fell as
Sidney
wrapped his arm
around her waist.

“I don’t imagine we’ll be seeing you again.”

He turned, and she allowed him to guide her out of the
cafeteria and up the hallway. She soaked up the warmth from his body. The
run-in with her past had her off kilter.

“Since we just faced your baggage head on, it only seems
fair I share mine. I know I overreacted the last time we were together, but I
had my reasons. I took the time these past couple of weeks to work my way
through … unresolved issues.”

Sutton turned to face him when they reached her car, and
smiled. He was an unconventional sort of handsome. His nose was a bit too
large, and slightly curved from his years playing rugby when he was
younger.
 
His salt and pepper hair was
mostly salty. Still, right now he was her knight in shining armor.
 
She wasn’t used to having someone defend her
and fight her battles. It was something she could get used to.

 
She titled her head
back to glance up at him a she leaned against the car, and slid
her
 
hands
into his
soft onyx strands of hair. She rose up onto her tip-toes and allowed her mouth
to caress his in a gentle meeting of lips before she pulled away.

“Thank you.”

“I told you I take care of what’s mine,” he said.

“Am I?” she whispered as she traced a finger down his neck,
smirking when he hissed.

“Are you what?”

“Still yours.”

“Yes, if you want to be.”

“I’ve missed you terribly, Sid.
 
I won’t even attempt to lie about that.
However, the disappearing act has to be addressed. I won’t be with someone who
runs hot and cold again.”
 
She shook her
head as she pushed away thoughts of
Jackson
.
This was her chance for closure, and a fresh start.

“I would never expect you to deal with that on a long term
basis, Sutton, and that’s why I asked for some time apart.”

“Speaking of time, how did you manage to show up just when I
needed you?”

“I was just leaving my office for the evening when I got
Leigh’s text.”

“I’m glad.
 
I don’t
think he would have taken my brush off seriously.”

“That’s because he’s an arrogant horse’s
arse
.”

She laughed at his accurate description. “You hit the nail
on the head there.”

“We should continue this in a more private location. Do you
want to follow me back to my place?”

She nodded her head as they parted ways, and she slipped
inside of her car.

Chapter
Eleven

Sidney
began his
explanation once they were seated on his couch with drinks. She opted for
water, but he found he needed a scotch to take the edge off.
 
He swirled the amber liquid in his glass as
she waited patiently beside him.

“When I met Christine, she was twenty-seven and I was
forty-six. We were at a BDSM club event. I play often, but it’s not a practice
of mine to take on
submissives
personally. So when
she approached me, I didn’t think of anything more than the pleasure we brought
one another.”

 
He paused to take a sip of his drink as the
moment replayed in his mind. It was times like this he cursed his photographic
memory. The images were just as fresh as the day it had occurred.

“She was young, blonde, and eager to learn. At first, the
age difference didn’t bother me. She was a woman in search of knowledge, and I
was indulging her. The first time we met she was un-collared and curious.
 
So when she asked for a demonstration I
agreed.”

“What did she want a demonstration of?” Sutton asked.

He cringed mentally as he glanced up and met her gaze.
“Flogging.”

Her eyes widened, but he was relieved to find them free of
censure.

“I started her off with a light round of gentle swats. She
came alive underneath the leather tassels, and I knew she had the potential to
make someone a great sub.”

“Is that what changed your mind?”

“No, she was very green, and I wasn’t.
Newbies
in general are a risk to invest your time in because they’re basically
auditioning the lifestyle to see if it suits them. When you add youth on top of
it, the odds of them walking away after you’ve put your time and effort into
them dramatically increase. Traditionally, I prefer to play with a more
experienced woman who’s been in the life for awhile.”

“Because they know the rules?”
Sutton
asked.

“Partially, but more so because they understand themselves,
what they like, where their limitations lie, and what direction they want to
travel in.
 
It makes my job as a Dom
easier to perform. ”

“You seem like the type of man who likes a challenge.”

“Sometimes,” he said. “Certainly, that was the case when it
came to you.”
 

“Why?”

“Because your responses were the most raw and natural I had
ever seen.”

“How can you say that? Isn’t that why you were with this
girl?”

“Her name was Christine, and what I have yet to mention is,
she was an actress. After our session at the party she pursued me. It was
flattering, of course, but I resisted for months.”

“Why?”

“Because there’s nothing worse than an old man whose been
made out to be fool by a younger woman. Also, what she said she was looking for
didn’t match what I believed I had in me to give.”

 
Sidney
’s gut twisted into knots as he took
the leap and opened up to Sutton for the first time. “After a few failed
attempts at a relationship as a youth, I figured they weren’t for me. BDSM
offered me an alternative. I was providing someone with what they wanted, but
there was no deep emotional connection. I didn’t have to meet parents, or go to
dinners with friends.” He could see the confusion in her face as she frowned.

“We’re nothing like that.”

“Not all BDSM relationships are like the one we have now,
and I was always careful to seek out like-minded partners. We were friends who
fulfilled a need for one another, and that was as far as it went.”

“Why would you want to live like that,
Sidney
?”

This was the moment he’d been dreading. When he laid
everything out on the line and waited for her response.

“I had a horrible example of relationships growing up. My
father was an alcoholic who liked to beat my mother and terrorized my sisters
and me. From the moment I hit my growth spurt at eleven, it became my duty to
protect them. I think the experience fostered my need to be in control of
things, as well as my interest in the study of human behavior.”

“Oh my God,
Sidney
,
I’m so sorry.”
 
Her eyes were warm and
filled with sympathy, but no pity. That he could handle.

“It’s the past now, and I’m honest enough to admit, my
mother should have left, but it’s just not what you do where we come from.”

“What made Christine so different from everyone before her?”

“Looking back on it now I think it was just
time
to take a chance combined with the
fact that she wore me down. After six months of saying no, my mind began to
wonder
what if.
I’m not a man who
lives his life with regrets, so I agreed to a trial period. Thirty days to see
if we were could meet in the middle and find common ground.”

“It’s obvious you must have,” Sutton said.

“We did. She brought out a protective instinct in me that
allowed her to work her way under my skin. She had some issues being bratty,
but I saw it as a challenge that would push me to become a better Dom.”

“Bratty how?”

“Christine purposely disobeyed my orders, and did what she
could to test my boundaries, and get a rise out of me, or in her words when she
left,
attempt
 
to
.”
 
Bitterness rose inside of him as he scowled.
 
“For three years things were great. I thought
she was the one, and I bought a ring.”
Sidney
rushed ahead when Sutton gasped. If he stopped now he would never get all the
words out. It still burned him that he had been played so easily. “I came home
early from work, ready to propose, and found her moving her things out of the
house.”

“Oh my God!
Sidney
!”

He glanced up to see her cover her mouth with her hand. Her
brown eyes were wide and filled with horror. It was an unexpected comfort. She
didn’t seem to see him as less of a man.
 
A man was supposed to be strong,
and not show weakness, and being taken for a ride was a huge oversight,
especially for me. I study the behavior of others for a living, for Christ’s
sake
.
 
That’s your father talking.
 
Sidney
had moved on from
the past for the most part, but occasionally it snuck back in to haunt him. “As
she packed she told me I was cold, emotionless, and would be alone for the rest
of my life if I didn’t change. She said the BDSM was an experimental stage for
her that was coming to an end, and she’d found someone better suited to her
needs.”

“What a bitch!”

Her anger on his behalf made him smile. She and Christine
were like night and day. It was a shame he’d let his insecurity blind him to
that fact for so long. He owed
Jackson
really. Without his unwanted appearance he’d have to eat a lot more crow to get
her back.