Zombie Zero (5 page)

“That’s the one you have to split up to get seven,” Maya said, taking up his narration. “But even if it counts as two, it’s hardly a sign. A sign is an indicator of something about to happen, a signal before the event. The antichrist emerging is surely the point of no return, and the battle between good and evil is the actual apocalypse. So…you really can’t count them as separate, or as signs. At that point, it’s a wrap.”

Allen nodded. “The misunderstanding probably comes from the mention of the seven seals, in John’s revelation; as each seal is broken, we move closer to the final end. However, there is no clarification of what is meant by the word ‘seal’. The vision spoke of seals in a book being broken, and events following that break. The first four seals break, and the four horsemen emerge; things get even more vague and symbolic after that. There is also no mention of what causes the seals to break, or what that means.”

“If the four horsemen are literal,” Maya added, “then they will be pretty easy to spot, even if their appearance is indication that it’s already too late. If they’re figurative, as many believe them to be, they could be assigned to many events throughout history, which they already have.”

Todd looked over his shoulder at Allen, then shook his head in Maya’s direction.

“You two are so goddamned annoying sometimes,” he mused happily.

“Right back at ya, big guy,” Allen murmured.

“There’s Elayna,” Maya said, nudging Todd. She raised her voice.

“Elayna!” she cried. “Over here!”

“Maya!” Todd whispered fiercely. “What are you doing? She’s just going to pester me about Ronnie.”

Allen watched her trudging across the lawn. Elayna looked like she had slept in the clothes she was wearing; or perhaps crumpled them at the edge of someone’s bed, not slept at all, then put them back on to drag her feet through campus. She was a pretty girl, even with the dark circles and rumpled clothes and slumped shoulders. Her eyes were downcast as she walked, and her arms dangled limp at her sides. Her feet barely left the ground, dragging each step across the trimmed grass.

Maya called her name again, and she stopped.

Elayna turned, and gave them a little wave. She turned away again.

“Come here!” Maya called out.

Elayna stopped and looked down at her ensemble. She glanced over at them, then sighed visibly and started to trudge towards them.

Todd glanced over his shoulder.

“Hey, little man,” he grinned. “How come you’ve never hooked up with Elayna?”

“Shut up, Todd,” Allen grumbled.

“Maybe she isn’t his type,” Maya pointed out.

“As if,” Todd shot back. “She’s beautiful, she’s got a big ass and titties, and she’s easy. She’s everybody’s type.”

“Cut it out,” Allen frowned.

“Come to think of it, why haven’t we ever hooked up with Elayna?” Todd nudged Maya; she giggled, and hushed him.

“Come on, you guys, stop it,” Allen hissed.

It still took awhile for her trudging steps to reach them. Elayna plopped down in the grass on the other side of Maya.

“Are you hung over?” Maya asked, concerned.

“Nah.” Elayna hiccoughed. Allen could smell the booze from where he sat. “Still drunk. Seems like maybe the mushrooms are still working too.”

Elayna held her own hand in front of her face, splaying her fingers and swirling them about in front of her. She laughed, dropped her hand.

“Yep,” she concluded.

“Real bright,” Todd said. “Who needs brain cells, right?”

“Actually, Todd,” Maya pointed out, “psilocybin is the only compound that has been proven to regrow damaged brain cells.”

“He knows that,” Allen piped up. “Or at least he should. His favorite podcaster talks about it all the time. He’s just too concussed from football and brain damaged from beer to fire the synapses required to store or retrieve the information.”

“My favorite podcaster also says stop being a pussy, and be a man,” Todd shot back. “Who’s not listening now?”

“You guys are so mean to each other,” Elayna noted quietly.

Maya tugged at her frumpy blouse. “And where were you last night? With Ronnie?”

“Ugh,” Elayna made a face. “Please don’t mention that name.”

Todd sighed with visible relief. Elayna peered at him over Maya’s lap.

“There’s something seriously wrong with your friend, you know,” she said. Allen watched the muscles that had just relaxed in Todd’s back as they bunched tensely. Todd shook his head.

“I told you to leave me out of it,” he said.

“Because you know there’s something seriously wrong with your friend,” she shot back.

“Of course there is,” Allen laughed. “He’s friends with brainless here. Is that not indication enough that there’s something seriously wrong with the guy?”

Elayna shook her head slowly. “Aren’t you his friend?”

“Him?” Allen sputtered, and made as if to spit in the grass. “Bite your tongue, young lady! Todd is my Lex Luthor.”

Now it was Todd’s turn to sputter.

“Oh, no!” he laughed. “Does that make you Superman? Put your heads between your legs and kiss your asses goodbye, folks. We’re all doomed!”

Chapter 2

A thick slab of stone that appeared to be nothing more than a wall shifted for the first time in thousands of years. Deep within the great pyramid, sand drifted with the motion. A quiet click did not sound, as there was no one there to hear it; and the slab of stone did not move to reveal a dark chamber beyond, as there was no one there to see it. For the first time since the last time, the room was filled with the air that carried the modern world on its currents. Electronic information flooded the space silently, billions of voices crying out their anguished swan song as one soundless symphony. A symbol began to glow on the wall, the glow immediately starting to fade. As if a battery was wearing down, or a dimmer switch was slowly being turned by some unseen hand, the light behind the symbol continued to die in almost imperceptible increments. At the same time, on the other side of the world…

“Professor Mallory,” the dean said calmly, “I must request that you withhold any manuscripts that you have written or are writing from subsequent publication.”

“Dean Dreece,” Mallory responded, imitating his formal tone. “I must ask you to explain yourself.”

They stared at each other across the dean’s wide desk. After a few moments, they both broke into laughter.

“Seriously, Adam,” Mallory said. “What the hell?”

The dean moved a pile of papers closer to him on his desk. He read aloud from one. “‘The problems that threaten our world are not problems in and of themselves; they are symptoms of a problem. That problem is irresponsible excessive propagation of the human race. Thousands of years ago, the decree to ‘go forth and multiply’ was an important one for the human race to follow, and parents were selflessly serving humanity by having as many offspring as possible. Now the sky and the earth are being choked to death by that ongoing rampant multiplication. The most selfish and destructive thing a person can do is bring yet another child into this already overly taxed environment. The selfish blindness of the modern parent will lead to the extinction of mankind if not reigned in.’”

Mallory frowned. “That’s from my blog.”

“John.” The dean glanced at the next printout. “Seriously? You’re preaching government-mandated population control.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Mallory muttered. “I’m basing the whole book on the absence of personal and financial responsibility in a large number of parents. If I were preaching anything, it would be an overhaul of the public school and tax distribution systems in our country. Pointing out an obvious problem or the obvious solution is just me stating the obvious. Putting the weight of the responsibility where it belongs is the purpose of my book. If we can dispel the age old myth that there is something inherently selfless in having a child, people will have more time and money to invest in our greatest resource.”

“Devil’s Brew Stout Ale?” Dreece grinned while he poked. Mallory loved his beer; it was the only thing he took more seriously than social injustice and forgotten languages.

“Personal development.” Mallory made a face at his friend. “Each generation’s values are being diluted by the growing parental ineptitude of the last. People who can barely hold down menial jobs or perform anything more than the most basic task are being thrust into positions of ultimate power in their homes simply by having unprotected sex. Their partners leave them, because they are clearly intolerable and incomplete human beings, but the kid or kids are stuck being led into life by someone who has never been considered for any kind of leadership role before. For obvious reasons.”

The dean sighed. He indicated the bottles displayed across the room.

“Tell me you’re taking down the blog, John,” he said, “or pour me a drink. Even better, do both.”

“Dammit,” Mallory swore, moving to the bar. “You quashed my last blog. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to write the book on gender inequality that I had planned without some forum to test my ideas and get feedback. You can’t have this one too.”

“I have an idea,” the dean said. “What if the only reason that infinite worlds exist is because someone thought of them? What if the only people who are represented multiple times throughout the infinite worlds are the people who seriously consider the possibility of infinite worlds?”

The professor poured them each a finger of scotch. He eyed the dean skeptically as he neared with the drinks.

“You definitely need this more than me.” Mallory set the glass on the desk. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about an idea,” Dreece shrugged. “It’s been proven that science fiction and quantum theory were right all along. There are other dimensions out there, wherever ‘out there’ is. Besides floating in apparently unending space in all directions, we are also sandwiched between infinite dimensions of reality. Each of these dimensions is as vast as our own, and many are assumed to be virtually the same as ours. Science itself now tells us that every minor decision we make results in a variety of other versions of ourselves. Each version makes a slightly different decision, and the different courses taken result in a whole new reality for both the individual and the world.”

Mallory drained his drink. “How many times are you going to multiply infinity times itself like a child before you get to the point?”

Dreece laughed. “I’m thinking about writing a book around this idea, with some people from our world that are obviously interested in the theory of infinite universes. I have some other very compelling ideas for the main characters that would help show even further that this may indeed even be the Earth they know, only thousands of years ago. Perhaps each universe keeps repeating some pattern in the same way, reaching for an opportunity to break out of that pattern. Perhaps each universe has its own pattern, slightly or completely different from ours. Perhaps key players who let their minds wander to these possibilities tend to show up in every new age, and in many of these dimensions.”

“Sounds like another best seller from the great Adam Dreece.” Mallory stood and picked up both of their glasses. He threw Dreece a wink to make sure he knew that the comment was made in all seriousness, and sincere admiration.

“You know what my students say when I tell them there’s a test coming up?” Mallory put more intoxicant in each glass this time before bringing them back to the dean’s desk. “Yig!”

They laughed together. It was the swear word from Dreece’s fantasy series that had swept more than one nation of young readers off its feet.

“What’s it like to be dean of a prestigious school full of kids that grew up reading your books?” Mallory asked, not for the first time. “Truly, Adam, how’s the good life?”

Dreece shrugged. “Pretty good.”

He took a sip, cleared his throat.

“That’s my point, John,” the dean said gently. “Maybe instead of trying to rile folks up with a non-fiction commentary on what awful people a large percentage of the population are, you could write a fiction story that touches on all of the things you want to say. Isn’t Ayn Rand your favorite author? Didn’t she write in the introduction to one of her most popular books that an idea wasn’t worth exploring if a compelling story couldn’t be written around it?”