Your Orgasmic Pregnancy (18 page)

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Sex Near the Time of Your Due Date May Help
With all the mixed information floating around concerning sex near your due date, we need to set the record straight. Prostaglan- dins, which are chemicals present in male semen, are widely be- lieved to aid in the induction of labor. For years, midwives have suggested topical application of semen to soften the cervix and

help it ripen. And as we discussed in the last chapter, some re- search indicates that swallowing her partner’s ejaculate during fellatio can actually be good for a pregnant woman and her baby. “I encouragemypatients to have lots of sex in the last month,” says Dr. Meulenberg. “For some it works, for others not.”

What about fears of triggering a premature birth? A 2001 study involving nearly six hundred women at three prenatal clin- ics found strong evidence
against
the popular notion that sexual activity correlated in any way with increased risk of preterm de- livery. Continuing sexual activity into late pregnancy was actually a strong predictor of the pregnancy’s going full term or beyond. While researchers could not identify the mechanisms at work, their findings turned up evidence that late-pregnancy orgasm, even in the absence of intercourse, reduced the risk of preterm birth. Other studies have confirmed similar findings.

A 2006 study involving twohundredhealthywomenwithun- complicated pregnancies found that among overdue births, the sex “home remedy” is safe and effective. Women who had inter- course late in their pregnancies (about four times a week from the thirty-sixth week on) were more likely to deliver between the thirty-ninth and forty-first week than those who abstained.

Sex appears to be a natural way to jump-start labor, though most of our physician friends remain unconvinced that the rela- tionshipisclear-cut. Wearecertain, however, that theprospectof late-term sex usually thrills couples, especially the woman. Most women, eager to reclaim their bodies, are totally up for evicting their little tenant by the end of T3.

Dealing with leaky boobies? Nearly every woman we inter- viewed noticed some breast leakage by pregnancy’s end. Phasing into the third trimester, breasts tend to leak a little colostrum, a usually yellowish, although sometimes clear, fluid that is high in protein, carbohydrates, and antibodies. Colostrum is designed to nourish your infant during the first couple of days following birth. Nipple massage is especially beneficial during this time. It helps you prepare for nursing and also promotes the release of themood-elevatingneurotransmitteroxytocin,sometimescalled the bonding hormone. Close to your big day, nipple massage can expedite labor and the oxytocin-exchange cycle. To induce labor, you and/or your partner should rub and massage each nipple and areola for fifteen minutes, three times a day. You’ll feel your body relaxing more with each session.

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Not-Quite-Intercourse Options

Because many couples may not be up for sexual intercourse dur-

ing T3, we want to be sure you have a number of alternative meth- ods for staying connected during the last totally private moments youandyourpartnerwillhaveforaverylongtime. Awidearrayof options exists to keep your action hot and thrilling.

Interfemoral Sex

Whenyourenergy’s tappedout, agood optionisinterfemoral(lit- erally “between the thighs”) sex. Your partner thrusts a dildo or penis back and forth between your lubed-up thighs while the two of you maintain full-body, skin-on-skin contact. This action can

spell divine relief for a throbbing vulva, raging clit, and pulsat- ing penis. For the highest degree of stimulation to both parties, squeeze your legs tightly around the phallus and vary the amount of pressure you apply.

Fleshlight Fun

When you’re not in the mood for all-out intercourse, hand your lover a fleshlight. Hailed by countless men as the ultimate male masturbation toy, this soft, silky, penis sleeve replicates the feel- ingofavagina. It resembles anoversized flashlight in transparent casing, but the lid at the end twists off to reveal a realistic-look- ing “vulva.” It has a removable base for those who need greater length or who want to insert a vibrator. This toy, made of phthal- ate-free “reel-feel super skin,” will keephimhappywhileyouaget a break.

Bondage Tape

Kinkitupanotchbymummifyingeachotherwithbondagetape. Made of thin, colorful, plastic material, this two- to three-inch- wide tape makes for a perfect blindfold, erotic gag, or bind. Cre- ate new looks by “dressing up” in the tape, use it to bind your love slave’s ankles and wrists, or wrap a few key spots and snap some sexy photos.

Autoerotic Access

Don’tletthat bellygetinthewayofyourself-loving. Ifyourtummy ismakingit tough toreachyourprivates, try rubbingorsqueezing your thighs together tightly. Reach down and around the belly for

side-entry access, or boldly go around the backside. Stimulation fromalternative anglescanbechallenging, butit’s wellworthit. If you have a sensitive anus, a round-the-back routine will stimulate additional nerve endings in your backdoor area, enhancing your pleasure. Better still, lengthen your reach with a vibrator. It’s sure to get you off quickly and easily, saving you a lot of work. Some preggies experience their first “mechanical” orgasms during late pregnancy, with rave reviews (see below). As always, be sure to squeeze your PC muscles in tandem with your stroking, and get your workout as you work one out.

Sixty-Nine Me

Oral enthusiasts will particularly enjoy the benefits of the “69” position during T3. You will probably be most comfortable ly- ingonyourside. Usingpillows, arrangeyourselves into aposition where both partners can simultaneously deliver hot tongue ac- tion, leisurely or frantically lapping, pressing, ormassagingaway.

• Your Battery-Powered Best Friend
  

  That vibrating wand in the back of your panty drawer may be-
  

  come your best friend during pregnancy, even if you normally tend to shun manual or electronic masturbation. There’s no bet- ter time than pregnancy to invest in a battery-operated sex prop. Your vulva, screamingforrelieffromthesexualtensioncausedby engorgement and the downward pressure in your abdomen, will thank you.
  

  Favorite pleasure playthings of the pregnant set include:
  

  • Waterproof Delight: a powerful multispeed vibrator that is perfect for private time in the bath or shower
    
  • Mini or Pocket Rocket: fits into your purse or pocket for those on-the-go “emergency” situations
    
  • Nubby G, Dolphin, UltraTech 3000, Rabbit: provide in- tensevaginaland G-spotstimulation viarotating shaftwith the added bonus of clitoral massage from the base (girls, it doesn’t get much wetter or better!)
    
  • Venus Butterfly: can be worn like a G-string over your clitoris, providing you pleasure no matter where you are (as longasit’s noisy) orwhat you’re doing. Theremote-con- trol version allows you and your lover to trigger the toy from afar
    
  • iBuzz: plugs into your iPod or MP3 player, allowing you to vibrate your way to a sexy fix anytime, anywhere, in rhythm to your favorite music
    
  • Je Joue: moves to vibratory patterns from preprogrammed songs; the music causes the toy to twirl, swirl, quiver, and vibrate all over your body
    
  • Clit Tickler: slides over his penis to rub its soft, knobby nodules against her clitoris during intercourse, providing both partners with great pleasure
    
  • Erection Master: a flexible, vibrating silicone ring worn at the base of the penis to stimulate both partners’ genitals
    

    We have included the contact information for a number of reputable sex-toy retailers in the Resources section in the back of this book. Exploring the wonders of vibrator-induced eupho- ria can double the fun for couples, so choose one of the more ad- vanced devices that titillate both partners simultaneously. Or take turns using a vibe on each other, hitting hot spots all over the body. These gadgets can stimulate much more than just the geni- talia. If you use a toy for penetration in any orifice, be sure to ap- ply plenty of lube.
    

    Important:
    Never, ever swap sex toys with your lover until they have been properly cleaned. Cleanliness is an absolute must when using toys in the anal region. Pregnant or not, you don’t want to contaminate yourvaginawithbacteriaorviruses fromthe rectal region. If you must share, cover your toy with a disposable condom and change it with each use, or wash your toy with soap and warm water between uses. Even better: Spring for individual love machines.
    

• Give That Preggie a Hand
  

Manual stimulation is a great way for your partner to pleasure

you, no matter what trimester you’re in or how big your belly is. A 1998 review of studies on sexuality during pregnancy found that 82 percent of pregnant women preferred mutual petting when intercourse had to be avoided for medical reasons.

Pregnancy can dramatically affect your tolerances and pref- erences, so be sure to communicate to your partner about how

How You Can Help Her

“Different strokes for different folks” is especially true during pregnancy. What felt good to your pre-preggie Hot Mama may now be too much or not enough. Flexibility, experimentation, and communication are key.

for partners

much pressure you want and whether you want it applied directly or indirectly to clitoris, vaginal lips, and other sensitive hot spots (see the Appendix for illustrations of the female external and in- ternal sexual anatomy). Using natural vaginal juices or your fa- vorite lube, strokeherentirevulvalareafromanus to monspubis. Zero in on the clitoris, lightly at first, then using firmer back- and-forthorcircular fingermotions, always checking inwithher to makesurethepressureis just right. Onceyou’vefoundtheper- fect touch, maintain a firm rhythm. Even if she started off wetter thanever, have somelubehandy to keepthingsslick, smooth, and sensational for your sex goddess.

About two inches inside the vaginal opening on the front (stomach side) wall of the vagina lies the G-spot. This can be an incrediblyarousingerogenouszoneforwomen, especiallyduring pregnancy—even if it wasn’t previously. Venture just a little far- ther up, to the area between her G-spot and cervix, and you may be able to induce lots of natural lube by tapping her A-spot.

• The Keep-Him-Happy Hand Job
  

  The simple deed of pleasuring him manually can be one of the
  

  bestactsofloveandgenerosityatiredpreggiecanbestow uponher partner.
  

  Some happy variations to try:
  

  • Slide the heel of your hand up and down the entire under- side of his penis.
    
  • Press your flattened handsagainst the sides ofhispenisand work your hands up and down his shaft.
    
  • Alternating your hands, “milk” him with upward strokes from the base to the tip of his penis, or try the same in re- verse.
    

    Don’t be afraid to use pressure; aside from getting kicked or punchedinthegroin, amancanactuallyhandlealot. Andmean- while, leave no hand idle and no other erogenous zone ignored. You can help him reach total-body orgasm by tending to other parts of his body while making his member the main attraction.
    

• Anal Play Without Going All the Way
  

Many couples enjoy anal pleasuring and make it a primary ele-

ment in their sexual repertoire. One gynecologist reported in 1992 that 40 percent of preggies in his practice expressed a desire to engage in anal sex. If anal is a fave of yours but has become dif- ficult during the third trimester, there are alternative ways to in- dulge. Gluteal sex and sex toys catering to the backdoor can offer

anexcellentway topleasure yourpartner. See Resources for a list- ing of sex-toy retailers.

Important:
When playing with any sex toy, but especially those designed for anal pleasuring, use a water-based lubricant that will not damage latex or invite infection.

Gluteal Sex