Unbeautifully Loved (Breathe Again) (29 page)

I dropped my phone back on the table and turned, lying on Lukas’ side of the bed inhaling his scent hoping it would help ease the tears but I couldn’t hold them in anymore and they began to fall.

I don’t know how much time passed but it couldn’t have been long when I heard the front door open and close, and then seconds later the same thing with my door as I watched his shadow make his way to the bed.

His eyes scanned the bed, finding my face and our eyes connecting in the darkness. I watched as he slid his boots off, kicking them to the side. Our eyes stayed connected as he lifted his tee over his head then tossed it to the side, it landing softly on the floor. I heard the zipper to his jeans followed by them falling down to the ground then sliding across the floor.

He stood looking down at me in nothing but his boxers for a moment before reaching down and pulling the covers back and I shifted over, giving him room to crawl in next to me. No sooner did the blanket flatten across his waist did I move into his arms needing nothing more than to be held. I buried my head into his chest and inhaled his fresh, musky scent that lingered around my nose.

This would be the last time he held me like this.

This would be our last night together.

The thought brought a sob to my lips that I couldn’t keep inside.

My right hand slid up his hard, warm chest and lay flatly over his heart as his arm slid under me and wrapped around my waist; pulling me as close as I could get. His free hand came across and rested on top mine. Our finger entwined tightly over his heart as I concentrated on the beat under my hand. He held me as the tears fell on his bare chest and small sobs rocked my body, never once did he loosen his hold on me; it only tightened.

In the safety of Lukas’ arms, the nightmare of Dex was long forgotten. My tears stopped as did the sobs and my body pushed tight against his warmth and I felt myself relax. I looked up at his face and drank in every detail of it, burning his image into my head, never to forget the moment for as long as I lived.

I shuffled myself, moving my right leg to rest across both of his. My hand, still over his heart could feel it start to race and it was a beautiful feeling. I searched his face before lowering my mouth to his and slowly brushing my lips across his. My tongue glided along his bottom lip, tenderly seeking entrance into his mouth when his lips parted and my tongue joined his.

It wasn’t long until we had each other undressed and I lay under him as our bodies connected in a way unlike any time before. He kissed, touched, smoothed, and licked his way over my body and I did the same with his, remembering every taste and every feel of him; locking it in my mind forever.

He slid in and out of me slowly, tenderly, taking his time so both of us felt and savored every single feeling we were giving one another. My walls quivered around him and I came undone unlike any other orgasm he’d ever given me, without a doubt beating out the one in the bathroom. I rode the wave for what felt like an eternity as he released inside me, holding me close, and our mouths connected, breathing each other’s air as it happened.

After a few moments passed he pulled himself out of me and wrapped me in his arms, holding me close like he was never going to let me go and I never in my life felt safer.

I knew my sleep would be without a nightmare.

“Lukas,” I mumbled my voice raspy.

My eyes were heavy and I felt sleep begin to take over, but not before I felt his head dip down and kiss me on the top of my head. “I’ll never let you go,” I heard him murmur.

Darkness began to fall around me as sleep had me in its grasps and I welcomed it without a fight. As I continued to fall deeper in the safety of Lukas’ arms, for the last time, I swear I heard his soft voice in the distance whisper, “I love you Lexie.”

Fuck!

Finally.

It felt like I sat in my car forever waiting for Mollie to take Finn down to the fucking park while the tease hopped into that fucktards truck.

I needed back into her place; and I needed back in there
now
.

Using the back door that was unlocked, like I had done before, I jogged through the hall and up the stairs– right into her room. It was the same as last time; clean and the bed was perfectly made with one of her shirts tossed on top.

I picked it up and brought it to my nose, inhaling her scent, her scent that shot through me, right to my dick, making it twitch and instantly hard in my jeans. Tossing it back down, I walked around her room, looking, when I stumbled over something beside the bed.

“The fuck,” I hissed under my breath.

I bent over and picked up the small duffle bag knowing exactly what was inside; I had seen the fucker bring it over. A bag of clothing, and not only did he have clothing here, clothing the bitch probably wore, but they were also fucking in the bed I was standing beside. But it wouldn’t be for much longer because soon it would be me who was fucking her and Lukas would be out of her life; forever.

I walked over to her dresser looking over her things again. Last time I was here it was her cross that caught my eye. Just the image of it around her neck while she straddled me with my dick buried inside her, while she bent over me to run her tongue over my lips was too much for me. I couldn’t control myself and I had to have it. Same thing happened with one of her bras. Saw it in her basket and I saw her standing in front of me with nothing but that on and I ended up having to take care of myself right there in her room.

Looking at what was on top of her dresser, I noticed her bottle of body spray that was almost empty and the pictures that surrounded it; pictures of her and Finn and her and Mollie. As I looked between the pictures, my cell rang from inside my jeans pocket.

Pulling out my cell I looked at the name on the screen. I had avoided the call long enough and was almost out of time as I contemplated what my next move would be. As it started to ring again, the idea played over and over in my mind.

Everything was about to change the moment I took this call.

Hesitating, I flipped it open and put it to my ear before speaking.

“Yeah, the info was right,” I said rushing back down the stairs and out the back door.

My eyes snapped open at the sound of the shower turning off. I felt the coldness at my back from Lukas’ absence.

Memories of the night before flashed through my head, as we made love and there was no mistaking the term. We made love.

It was the most amazing sexual experience I had ever had, taking our time exploring each other, remembering one another’s tastes, each other’s
touch and the way we made each other feel followed by the most intense orgasm I’ve had and it was all at the hands of Lukas, who I wasn’t going to see again once he left for work.

Dex was coming, I knew it. I could feel it and the dream I had just made the feeling even more real, and leaving Camden would most likely kill me but it’s the only way to get Finn and I to some place safe and far away from him.

Hearing the bathroom door open, not wanting Lukas to know I was awake, I closed my eyes. I just wanted him to get dressed and leave. I wouldn’t be able to face him knowing it was going to be the last time I saw him and I knew, him being Lukas, he’d look at me and know. And that was the last thing I wanted to happen.

Still pretending to be asleep, I heard Lukas’ feet move across the floor and stop at my side of the bed. I could sense him watching me before I heard his towel fall to the floor then rustle around for his clothing. I heard the sound of his zipper then the bed shift as he moved across the bed towards me, the heat of his body radiating off him hitting me in the back, and smoothing over my bare shoulders rolling down the entirety of my body.

His hand softly moved the hair off my shoulders and I felt his breath roll over my cool skin before his lips connected with my shoulder. I felt two small water droplets fall off his body and on to mine; his scent lingered under my nose.

His scent was one of my favorites.

One I’d always remember.

His lips traveled from my shoulder and up the side of my neck leaving small warm kisses that made my skin tingle as his mouth hovered over my ear.

“Lex,” he whispered in my ear, “gotta get to the station.”

“Okay,” I mumbled trying to sound like I was still half asleep.

He kissed my temple. “You sleep okay?” he asked, his hand rubbing up and down my arm.

“Perfect,” I mumbled honestly.

I did, not a single nightmare after I fell
asleep in his arms, not a single thing woke me until I heard the sound of the shower.

He kissed my temple again before whispering, “Good, you gonna be okay today?”

“I’m fine Lukas; it was just a bad dream, I don’t remember it now,” I sighed lying.

I remembered every minute of the dream and I wasn’t going to be okay, not for a long time.

Not without Lukas and definitely not until I was rid of Dex.

“Baby,” he said pausing, “If you need me, call me. I gotta go look into some things.” He kissed my neck before I felt him pull away, taking his heat with him and coldness taking over.

I nodded my head.

I didn’t trust myself to say anything. I could feel the lump forming in my throat and my eyes and nose begin to burn. I listened to him finish getting dressed, sliding on his leather jacket and finally finishing with his boots.

I listened as Lukas’ boots walked across the room towards the door then stop. “Be back soon, Lex.” His voice was gruff, no smoothness or softness to it, nothing but gruffness in the form of a promise.

We won’t be here.

“Bye Lukas,” I said hoping my voice didn’t sound as torn as I felt.

He didn’t say anything else, only opened the door and left, letting the door close softly behind him. I listened closely as I heard the front door open then close. Not long after I heard the roar of his truck come to life as I pictured it backing out and leaving. As
the roar of his truck disappeared, the
tears were no longer able to stay away and began to fall, and I pulled the blanket closer to my body as silent sobs rocked my body.

“Mollie,” I called from my door way.

“What?”

“Can you get Finn and come up here,” I said then walked to my closet to finish getting dressed.

I had no idea what to tell Mollie, I knew it wasn’t going to go over well, she was going to be angry and protest then try everything to convince me to stay.