The Happiest Day (18 page)

Rachel packed her
bags the next day and traveled to the beach house in South Carolina.  Part of
her worried that it would hurt too much to be where the family had been so
happy, but she needed to go where she could be completely alone.  The fall
weather didn’t appeal to many beachcombers so she knew she could be isolated
from the world, which is exactly what she desired.  She left notes to be sent
to Maryanne and Bert and Laurie, in Boston.  She had the household staff help
her pack a trunk with most of her necessities since she wasn’t sure when she
would be back, if ever.  She told only Smythe where she would be, in the event
of an emergency, but swore him to secrecy otherwise.

She called her
manager, Jerry, at the newspaper and briefly explained that she would be gone
for a while and that he was to continue running the newspaper as he had always
done.  Any administrative duties could be administered by Maryanne, she explained. 
Then, without a backward glance, she left for South Carolina.

Once she arrived
at the beach house, she shopped for supplies, and then slept for the next three
days.  She would wake long enough to use the bathroom and eat a piece of fruit
or a bite of a sandwich, and then she would sleep again.  She remembered how
Norris had slept after Geoff’s death and how Dr. Miller said that he was trying
to protect himself from the pain of what had happened.  She had suffered a
death too—the death of what she thought her life was going to be.

Finally, she felt
as if she could leave the bed for more than a few hours at a time.  She began
walking.  She walked the beach several times a day, her mind a blank.

For the whole
month of October, she was alone.  Her mind was a blank during the walks.  She
knew that eventually she would have to face what had happened but for now she
just needed to heal.  October moved into November and the beach was still deserted,
except for one other person.  It took her a few days to realize that she had a
neighbor but she noticed that it was a man and he seemed to walk the beach
every day at the same time she did.  At first, they ignored each other and she
was grateful that he would pick the opposite direction when they were walking
at the same time.  Whoever he was, he appeared to want to be alone as much as
she did.

After a week,
however, she noticed that he began walking in the same direction as her, but
stayed several hundred feet behind her.  He didn’t really make her nervous but
she became more aware of him each day and wished that he would pick a different
time of day to walk.  She knew that she could pick a new time but she didn’t
want to seem like she was avoiding him.  He was a neighbor, after all.

At the end of the
second week, she noticed that he brought a camera with him and was taking
pictures of the surf.  It made Rachel anxious however and had an irrational
fear that someone in the family had sent him to spy on her.  After a few days,
though, he continued to maintain his distance from her and only seemed
interested in photographing the natural aspects of their environment.

By the third week,
she found the courage to lift a hand in a brief wave as she walked past where
he stood photographing a sand dune with tall grass.  He was younger than she
had assumed and boyishly handsome, with chestnut brown hair and a cleft in his
chin.  He smiled at her brief overture and waved back, then turned back to his
photography.  Rachel’s heart thumped a little.  It had been almost twenty days
since she had uttered a sound beyond her wrenching sobs throughout the night
and just a simple wave to a stranger made her feel as if she was performing in
front of a crowd.

The next day, it
was her neighbor that initiated interaction.  He waved and waited for her to
catch up to him.  “Good morning.  It’s a cold one.  Are you sure you’re bundled
up enough?”

“I’m fine.  Thank
you.” Her voice cracked a little after so many days of silence.

“Do you mind if I
walk with you?  I mean, if you want to be alone, I understand, but frankly I’m
going a little stir crazy.”

Rachel smiled
warily.  “I think I am, too.  You’re the first person I’ve talked to in over a
month.”

“Same here.  I’m
on a sabbatical from my job but I’m already itching to go back.”  He shifted
the camera out of the way and stepped forward, his hand outstretched.  “I’m
Theo, by the way.”

“Rachel.” She
shook his hand.

They began walking
and occasionally Theo stopped to shoot a picture.  “It’s so beautiful here,” he
said.  “This is my first time.  What about you?”

“No, this is a
family home.” She pointed back to the beach house.  “We had it built a few
years ago.”

“Yet you’re
alone,” he commented.  “Are you on sabbatical, too?  From your family?”  He
smiled to soften his question and let her know that she didn’t really have to
answer.

“I’m alone now,”
she answered.  “My family is gone.”

His smile died. 
“I’m sorry.”  They walked in silence for many more minutes.  Then he said, “I’m
going to ask you a question and please don’t think I’m crazy.  Would you mind
terribly if I photographed you?”

Rachel looked at
him in surprise.  “Why would you want to?”

“You look so sad,
it’s beautiful.”

“That’s a strange
thing to say.”

“I know but I’m a
photojournalist by trade and I can see beauty in things that the average person
wouldn’t.  Not to say that you’re not beautiful anyway, sad or not.  You’re gorgeous
as a matter of a fact, and now I’m sounding like a total creep.  I’m sorry.”

He was so charming
that Rachel had to laugh.  “It’s OK, Theo, but I’d really prefer not to be
photographed.”

“I understand,” he
answered easily.

She suddenly
stopped in her tracks and stared at him.  “You say you’re a photojournalist. 
You’re not Theo Bressler by any chance are you?”

Now it was his
turn to look wary.  “I…I really am trying to get away from it all.  I don’t
want anyone to know I’m here.”

“It’s all right. 
I’m the one person you can be sure that you are safe with.  I absolutely am in
hiding from the world.  I’m Rachel Thornton.  Norris Thornton’s widow.”

Surprise showed on
his face and he stopped walking.  “Damn, what a coincidence.  Your husband
offered me a job just a few weeks before he died.”

“Not him, me.  He
was very sick towards the end, so I was running the paper.  We were both amazed
by your work.”

“Thank you.”

“You turned me
down.”

“True.  Sorry,” he
laughed and began walking again.  “So who’s running the newspaper if you’re
here?”

“Norris had a
solid staff.  I left his daughter and son-in-law in charge of making decisions
but the newspaper can run itself.”

“Do you intend to
run it when you return home?”

“I have no
intentions right now,” she answered honestly.  “I’m just trying to heal.”

“I respect that,”
he said sincerely.  “Do you want me to leave you alone?”

She thought about
it for just a moment then shook her head.  “No, I think I like having a walking
partner.”

“Good.”

“So, tell me about
yourself.  I only know of you professionally.  Where do you come from?”

“Boston.  My
mother is an artist and my father is an accountant.  I’m the youngest of five
boys and her last hope that one of us would not follow our father into the very
boring world of numbers.”

“She must be very
proud of you.”

“I think she is. 
I don’t get to see them that much, I’m so busy traveling for work.”

“Why did you
choose here to rest instead of going home?”

“My family is very
large, very loud, and very Irish.  There would have been no rest.  I’m trying
to get back to basics, take some nature shots, do a little painting, and just
rejuvenate my mind.”  He stopped again to take another shot.  “So, your turn. 
I know you were married to Thornton.  How’d you meet him?”

“He was my
guardian.  My parents were murdered in their home when I was a child and he
took my brother and me in.  He was an old friend of my father’s.”

“Do I remember
correctly that his wife died tragically as well?”

“Yes.”  She didn’t
elaborate.

“Where’s your
brother?”

“He goes to a prep
school in the east.  Boston, actually.”

“Does he know
you’re here?”

“No one knows I’m
here and that’s the way I prefer it.  Look at the way that cloud is moving in.”

“Rain,” Theo said,
snapping several pictures of it.  “I guess we should head back.”

They arrived at
her house first and he pressed his hand to hers.  “I’m glad you’re here.  I’ll
see you tomorrow?”

“Yes.”  The first
of the drops hit her and she said, “Hurry!  I don’t want your camera to get
wet.”

He took off at a
run, protecting the camera under his jacket.  “Stay dry!  See you tomorrow!”

They walked
together after that, finding that they were able to converse on a variety of
topics easily.  Rachel liked him very much.  She felt comfortable with him and
he stimulated her intellect.  She looked forward to their daily walks which got
longer every day.  On one particularly cold and blustery day, just a week before
Christmas, they were in the middle of a conversation when they got back to her
house and she saw the disappointment on his face.  She felt a little of what he
was feeling.  As much as she had thought she wanted to be alone, she found she
was coming to depend on his companionship.

“Tomorrow then?”
he asked in a discontented voice.

“Would you…do you
want to come in?  I could fix us lunch.”

“I’d love to come
in, and how about we both fix lunch?” They entered the warmly lit beach house
and he noted the dying fire. “Let me get the fire stoked first.”

“Here, give me
your coat and I’ll hang it up.”  She hung his coat on the coat rack by the door
and took her own coat off.  She stood watching Theo build the fire then he
stood and turned.  His eyes flickered over her body and his smile died.  Rachel
stood firmly, waiting for his next words.  She wasn’t huge but at over four
months pregnant, she was showing a definite roundness around her middle.  She
placed her hands on her stomach to answer the question in his eyes.

“Yes, I am,” she
said with a smile.

“I didn’t know,”
he finally said.  “I’ve only ever seen you in a coat and you never mentioned
it.”

“It didn’t come up
in conversation.  Does it bother you?”

“Of course not. 
It just surprised me.  It must be very difficult for you, with your husband
gone.”

“It is.  We lost a
child early in our marriage and it seemed that there wouldn’t be any others.  I
didn’t find out I was expecting until after his death.”

“I’m sorry.”  He
took a step forward.  “Is it any wonder I find you fascinating?  You have so
many layers to you, Rachel.  I feel like everyday I learn something new.  It
makes me want to rush to tomorrow, but then I think, no, I don’t want to lose
today yet.”

Rachel felt a
blush work its way up her cheeks.  “Theo…”

“I know.”  He
laughed at himself.  “That was too much, too fast.  I’ve never been known for
my sophistication, though.  I know we’ve only known each other for a month, but
I have to admit that I am obsessed with you.  In a good way,” he said in a rush
then looked charmingly embarrassed.  “There I go again.  My mother always said
that my mouth would get me in trouble.”

“I think you’re
just fine,” she said softly.  “But let’s just keep things as they are, OK?”  It
had been only two months since Peter had left her but she was sure that she
would never be able to feel that way about another man.  “It hasn’t been that
long since…”  Her voice faded off.

“Since your
husband died,” he supplied.

“Yes, and I can
only concentrate on friendship.”  She touched her middle again.  “And the baby
of course.”

“I’ll be good, I
promise,” he said with a chuckle.  “Come on, let’s eat, I’m starving.”

That reveal of her
secret seemed to change something between them and they began spending most of
their time together over the next few days.  Even if Rachel just curled up on
the couch with a book, Theo stayed with her, reading, writing, and sometimes
drawing.  On Christmas Eve, she looked up from where she sat, an afghan over
her lap, and narrowed her eyes.  “What are you drawing?”

“Nothing,” he said
in too innocent of a voice.

“Theo…”

“You said you
didn’t want to be photographed.  You didn’t say anything about me not drawing
you.”  He looked up from his drawing pad.  “Humor me.  I need some souvenirs to
take when I leave here.”

She suddenly felt
sad.  “Are you leaving soon?”

His eyes became
serious.  “I’m staying until you leave.  I won’t want to be here after that.”

“Theo,” she said
warningly, although she had to admit that his openness with his feelings
appealed to her on a deep level.  This was something she had never gotten to
experience.

“Humor me,” he
said, returning to his drawing.  “I’ve lived my life out of a suitcase for the
past ten years, never stopping to get to really know anyone.  I can’t help it
if the first person I spend any time with happens to be the woman of my
dreams.”

His words warmed
her deep to her soul.  “You’re too sweet to me.”

“It has nothing to
do with sweetness.  Listen, Rach, I know the timing of this is horrible.  I
respect what you’re going through.  I just want you to know that I’m not going
anywhere. Oh, and I was wondering if that job offer still stood.”

“Theo, you turned it
down before.”

“Things change.  One
of the reasons I came on sabbatical is that I didn’t know what I wanted
anymore.  I had been working so hard for so long that I was lost.  I’m starting
to think more clearly and get some direction back in my life.  I want to work
for your newspaper as long as I’m given full creative independence.”