Sterling's Reasons (27 page)
Jessica was up and pacing again. She was making sounds, not forming words. Sterling braced herself for the moment she would discharge the gun again and tucked a possessive hand through Joe’s arm.
Sam heard the shot and stopped. He was puffing. He wasn’t as young as he used to be and this damn path just kept getting worse.
I’m too late,
he thought. He had followed them up here as fast as he could. He should have seen it coming.
He had. But he’d ignored it. He thought it would go away. After all, grief was a 212
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terrible thing. It made people act strangely. There was no real reason why he should have believed Jessica would actually hurt someone.
He made it to the clearing and looked up at the cabin. Sam could see her there, through the window, walking back and forth with the weapon clenched in her hands. He swiped a tired hand across his forehead. And he had thought things couldn’t get any worse. He trudged up the steps and swung the door open wide.
It was all the diversion Joe needed. Jessica swung around when Sam opened the door. The big man stood there, taking in the scenario in one swift glance. He called out to Jessica.
With the sun shining in from behind him, glinting off his mane of red hair, Jessica thought she saw her husband. “Red!” she cried and went to move toward him, gun swinging from one hand at her side.
Seconds ticked by. Heavy seconds. Joe let her get positioned with her back to him and then Joe lunged, grabbed, and dove to the floor, the gun caught safely in his hands; between himself and the braided rug. He sighed audibly, and let his forehead rest on the floor. He had the automatic. Everyone was safe.
Jessica let out a feral, blood-curdling scream and collapsed in Sam’s arms.
Sam gathered her close and held her, tears streaming down his face, his sad eyes on Joe.
Sterling threw herself down beside Joe. Her bruised knee objected, but she ignored it as she buried her face against his back. She heard his heart tripping quickly and felt his second sigh of relief.
“Are you okay?” he asked, turning his head just enough to look at her.
“Yes.” She didn’t know. “Are you?” Sitting back on her heels, Sterling wiped her hands over her eyes.
“Yep.”
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“Then why are you lying on the floor with the gun under you?” A nervous, wary smile played across her face.
“I wanna beer,” he stated dully.
She sat back flat on the floor and braced herself with her hands behind her.
“And a chaser.” What
she
wanted was a bottle.
Sam had moved outside with Jessica. They could hear her sobbing, hear the creak of the porch swing as he rocked her. Jessica made a weak and draining sound. Maybe now she could start rebuilding her life instead of trying to destroy it.
Joe rolled over and lay flat on his back and studied the ceiling. Not once did he really admit that he thought this would end with someone getting killed. Not once did he let on that his stomach was churning, that his palms were sweating or that his mind was reeling from trying to figure a way out of this without hurting Jessica.
“I’ll call Mr. Ramsburg. He’ll see to it that she gets the help she needs,”
Sterling offered.
“Good idea,” Joe agreed. He wanted that drink, but he was too strung out to move.
Sterling pushed the lethal weapon away from both of them with her finger.
“A couple of times there I was really afraid we weren’t going to make it.”
“Not me.” He lied so well. “I believe in fairy tales now, you know. I’ve had a good teacher.” He turned his head to look at the woman he loved. “Someone who wouldn’t give up when I told her to. Someone who didn’t quit when I seemed a lost cause.
You,
Sterling. Somewhere along the line,
you
did it. You made me think. You forced me to feel all the things I had stored away. I don’t think I’ll ever forgive you for it,” he teased. He was going to do a lot of that in their lifetime.
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She punched him and then stretched out full length beside him, pressed a kiss to his shoulder, and rested her hand on his rib cage. “Even the part about living happily ever after?”
He groaned and grinned at the beamed ceiling. “Especially that part. You endangered all of us, you know. If you had only done what I told you and waited.”
She got up and went to the refrigerator. She pulled two beers and popped the top on one and drank from it greedily. She took the other one to him and stood over him with it. Popping the top of that one, she began to tip it, threatening to drench him with it.
Joe shot up. Taking the beer, he sipped and headed back to the kitchen to find the bottle of Jim Beam. After opening several cupboards, he found the half-full bottle and a shot glass. He tipped the glass and emptied it, then poured himself another.
Sterling came to stand with him. Her nerves were making her act so giddy if she stopped and took the time to think, she would be a weeping mess and she’d have none of that. She braced herself against the kitchen counter and waited for the weakness to leave her limbs. She noticed the sounds on the porch had ceased.
Sam came to the doorway. He was pale and his eyes were red. His daughter-in-law was still propped up by his huge arms. Jessica looked dazed and lost; she didn’t even look up at them.
“I’m going to take her to a hospital.”
Joe turned and leaned a hip on the counter. “You want some help?” He hoped he didn’t. He didn’t feel like climbing down the mountain. He wasn’t the least bit inclined to continue his association with Red’s family at this moment.
Sam shook his head. “No, but thanks.” He turned his direct gaze on Joe. “I’m sorry.”
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Joe dismissed that with a wave of his hand. “Just take care of her.”
Sam and Jessica disappeared.
By now the sun was low in the sky. A breeze had picked up and Sterling could hear the stream rolling along, bubbling over the rocks and dropping down the ravine. It was the first she had heard it since she entered the cabin. She let the sounds settle her.
They both stood there, drinks in their hands. The shock, the daze, the full effect of what had happened began to wear off.
“Let’s go sit on the swing.” Without waiting for an answer, Joe took her hand and led her outside. It was getting chilly. Joe pulled her close to him and put his arm around her. With one foot pushing against the floorboards, Joe put the swing in motion.
“I heard you say you love me.”
“I was under a lot of pressure.” He did love her, but he didn’t quite know how to handle it yet. He still needed time to digest everything. Besides, the knowledge made her almost smug. A warmth spread throughout his body as if his circulation had just kicked back in. The reality. The cold reality was that he almost lost her. Lost her and what they could have together. The thought made him shiver.
She felt it move through him. “Do you want a flannel shirt? I saw one tossed across the chair.” If he didn’t, she did.
“Don’t move just now. Just be still. Just be here with me.”
She snuggled closer. His body was warm. If this had turned out any other way…
“I’m pretty upset with your coming up here after I told you to stay put.” It had to be said. She had to realize that she couldn’t continue to go through life doing any damned thing she pleased.
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Sterling thought he was teasing at first, but when he didn’t laugh she turned her face to study his. “You told me to stay put. I thought you suggested it. I don’t like to be told what to do.”
“I figured that out. You really threw this all off. I was handling things just fine until you showed up and panicked her.”
“Are you trying to tell me that you had this all figured out? That you knew it was Jessica that was doing these things? That’s bull and you know it.” She pushed away from him so she could be sure she didn’t miss anything his eyes could tell her.
“Of course I knew. I’m the cop, remember. I started suspecting as soon as I saw the picture on the door. A street thug wouldn’t be so delicate. When she called and insisted that I meet her up here, I was pretty sure.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” She practiced her patience.
“Where are the kittens?”
“Joe. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“For precisely the reason you think. I knew you would come up here and screw up everything.”
The anger canceled out her concern. “Oh, you did, did you? Did you ever consider the fact that if you’d told me I might have been content staying in Georgetown knowing you could handle the situation?”
“No. I’ve never seen you deny yourself anything so far.”
“That’s cold, Joe, and unnecessary.”
“It’s vital.” It was. If she was going to be his wife she had to understand that police business was just that. Business, not something for her to dabble in just because he did.
She realized he was tired, strained. But he would have to learn to accept her for who she was. She would never be easy to control.
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Returning his gaze to her, he took her hand. “I’m going back.”
Elated, Sterling planted a kiss on his stubbled cheek. “The beach. Great. But I think it’s beautiful here, too. Could we stay here a couple of days first?”
“I’m going back to the force.” He held tight to her hand and tried to gauge her reaction. Something flitted across her eyes and then disappeared. Her fingers tightened on his.
Mentally and physically exhausted, she fought tears of lassitude and alleviation. “Stop the swing, Joe. When did you decide this?”
“I don’t know. Sometime in the last twenty-four hours. I’m needed. I have a job to do. It’s me, Sterling. It’s what I do best.” Though he was tired, his eyes were clear. Clearer than she had ever seen them. He was better. He was alive again.
Yes, she knew it was him. Standing up, Sterling went to the railing and looked out around her. Had she come to hope he would give it up as he had said he would? Had she come to wish for a normal life of safe days and secure nights?
Maybe part of her had, but the other part knew. She had wanted it to last a little longer. That’s all. Just a little longer.
“And if you’re going to be my wife, Sterling, you have to learn to go about your fairy-godmother chores and leave the police business to me.”
His wife? His wife! He hadn’t even said he loved her and he was proposing.
Or was he issuing orders? Was he plunking things down in front of her to see how she set them in order?
Joe hated that he wasn’t better with words, better at saying exactly what he felt. He waited for her to move, to give him some hope that she wasn’t going to simply break his arm and march back down the path to her little wonderland existence. He stood up and pressed himself against her, circling her with his arms and pulling her back to rest against his chest.
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“Joe, all along I’ve been fighting to get you back to where you are now. Do you think it was simply for you or just for Mr. Ramsburg? At the beginning it was. Then somewhere along the line I fell in love with you, J.T. MacDaniels. It’s not whether I can handle your being a cop. The question is, can you handle my being your wife? I’m not docile. I won’t simply sit around and knit. And if ever, ever you are in danger and I know about it, I will be there.”
Relief flooded through him, and then the love between them soothed and eased him. He felt invincible and he liked it. He had her to thank for that. And so much more. “Was that a ‘yes, I’ll marry you’?”
“It’s a definite maybe.” Turning her head, she kissed his shoulder.
“Those words are diametrically opposed.” He spun her around and locked his arms around her.
Standing on her tiptoes, Sterling set a kiss on his chin and then, diving her hands in his hair, she pulled his mouth down to hers. “One cancels out the other, huh? Then I’ll have to choose one?” She pretended to consider the options as she ran her open mouth down his throat, pulled his shirt aside, and ran her tongue across his shoulder.
The sun had moved behind the trees. Night animals began to stir. A stiff breeze played around them.
They were alone. And safe. The last two days were history. Sterling felt a freedom course inside her, felt the anticipation of spending the rest of her life with this man. He was trailing light kisses over her face and talking to her. She didn’t understand the words. She didn’t need to. Taking his hand, she led him inside.
She sat on the bed and watched as he took off his boots. She let her eyes roam his body as he shed himself of his shirt and jeans. He was magnificent. And he was hers. All hers.
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“You could work for Ramsburg with me.”
He yanked the T-shirt over her head, laughing. “You should have better taste than to wear a shirt with a saying like that on it.” He traced featherlike kisses across her breasts.
“Or you could flip some burgers for Roy. Pick up trash for the sanitary commission. You could be a shoe salesman. With your charm and patience, all the old ladies in town would be swarming in to purchase Nikes. Or…” She was silenced when he crushed his mouth to hers and dipped his tongue to taste, to savor.
“Shut up.” He rolled her beneath him and she welcomed him.
“I know what. I could become a cop. We could be partners. Hell, we could get a dog and be famous renegade cops. Just think of it. Picture it. Me and you and a dog named Blue.”
“I wish I’d met you five years ago,” she murmured against his mouth.
“No. You weren’t ready for me. I’ve always been in love with the idea of you. I guess I never really believed I’d feel this way about anyone. It’s fate.