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Authors: Verna Clay

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* * *

After spending most of the night unable to
sleep, Hallie listened to Timmy's excited chatter the next morning as she
dressed. Oh, how she was loathe to face Cooper. He must think her a total
nitwit. What had she been thinking to sneak to the gambling deck by herself? A
sudden panic hit her.
What if he decides not to accompany us to Oregon?

"Ma? Ma…Ma!" Timmy shook her elbow.

"Oh, sorry, honey."

"Whatcha thinkin' 'bout? You been actin' strange
since we got up."

"I was just thinking about all the sights
we're going to see today," she fibbed.

"I can't wait! Do you 'spose the Hankersons
are up yet?"

"I'm sure they are. Let's tidy up and then
we'll knock on their door."

"Sure, Ma." Timmy stood on top of her
bed so he could reach his own above it and straighten the covers

A sudden burst of love filled Hallie's heart for
her precious son and she kissed his cheek. "I love you, Timmy."

Her boy turned and smiled. "I love you,
too, Ma. I bet Pa's watchin' us from heaven right now."

Hallie felt the quick stab of tears. "I
just bet you're right."

When they exited their stateroom, the Hankersons
were already standing on the promenade with Sammy holding his mother's hand
while his father locked their door. Sammy saw Timmy and shouted, "Timmy,
have you gotten sick from the rocking of the boat? I puked three times last
night, but I feel better now."

Timmy made a face. "No. I feel okay. Sure
hope I don't puke."

As Hallie greeted her friends, Mr. Hankerson glanced
past her. "Hello, Cooper. I hope you slept well."

Mortification flooded Hallie, but she gathered
her courage and turned around. Looking rested and having actually shaved his
usual growth of dark stubble to reveal an incredibly rugged, but handsome face,
Cooper stared at her. It seemed that his blue eyes twinkled and his mouth
quirked.

He turned his gaze on Emmett.

"I slept very well, Emmett," and then,
with a pointed glance back at Hallie, he finished with, "Fresh air does
wonders for a man's sleep."

Hallie's eyes widened.
Is he joking with me? He
doesn't seem angry.
Relief tumbled off her shoulders like a flash flood.

Emmet said, "Cooper, we missed you last
night, will you join us in the dining room? The food is adequate."

Hallie grinned. "Yes, please join us. It's
a lovely day and I forgot to tell you food is included in the ticket
price."

"I'd be pleased. As for last night, I got
caught up helping families get settled on the main deck and chasing more
wayward animals." He chuckled.

Emmett glanced at his wife and Hallie and made a
sweeping motion. "Ladies, lead the way."

After a short wait for a table, a waiter led
them to a corner with a lovely view. Cooper politely pulled out Hallie's chair
and then sat across from her, with Timmy and Sammy on either side of him. Mrs.
Hankerson sat next to Hallie with her husband at her other side.

Menus were placed in front of them and Timmy announced,
"I'm so hungry my stomach is touching my backbone."

Sammy piped up, "I'm so hungry my belly button
is touching my backbone," and everyone laughed. After that, the boys tried
to outdo each other in vocal creativity.

They gave their orders to the harried waiter, a
young man probably not more than twenty, with slicked back red hair and enough
freckles to fill a washtub. He introduced himself as Charlie, confiding that it
was his first steamboat job and someday he wanted to captain one.

Over a breakfast of biscuits, sausage gravy, scrambled
eggs, cornmeal mush, and strong black coffee, Hallie found herself relaxing and
enjoying adult conversation for the first time in a long while. Even when the
pastor and church members stopped by to check on her, she hadn't engaged in meaningful
conversation. Now, sitting here, she realized how much she missed conversing
with Thomas. Being somewhat disabled, he'd read extensively and shared his
knowledge with her.

Removing her thoughts from the past, Hallie
turned her attention across the table. Cooper lazed back in his chair and
looked from Timmy to Sammy. "Did you know that Kit Carson traveled the same
trail we're about to embark on? In fact, he was one of the first to map
it."

Timmy exclaimed, "Kit Carson! The mountain
man all the dime novels are about?"

"The very same."

 Sammy asked, "You got any of his
stories?"

Cooper chuckled, "Well, now, I just might
have one or two in my saddlebag. Would you like to borrow them?" He glanced
at Hallie and the Hankersons. "That is, if it's all right."

Hallie smiled. "Perfectly all right."

Emmett said, "I'd love to enjoy them
myself. I can read them to the boys."

After that, Timmy and Sammy couldn't stop
talking about Kit Carson and his many exploits.

When they rose to leave their table, Hallie
reached into her reticule to leave a tip for their young waiter with big dreams.
Cooper touched her hand. "No, ma'am. I've got it. You save your money for
the journey."

The expression in Cooper's eyes revealed his
determination, so she gracefully nodded and followed the others to the promenade.
As they stood at the railing watching waves ripple outward from the paddles, Cooper
tipped the brim of his hat in a parting gesture. "I'd best check on my
horse. I'll see ya'll later." He turned to leave.

Hoping Timmy wouldn't hear while his and Sammy’s
attention was focused on another steamer farther upriver, Hallie asked softly, "Cooper,
may I speak with you privately a moment, please?"

He adjusted his hat and motioned to an empty
section of the railing. "Of course, ma'am."

When she was alone with Cooper, Hallie felt
suddenly shy. "I-I just want to apologize for my unseemly behavior last
night. I should never have left my stateroom. It was foolish and you were right
to be angry with–"

Bending at the knees so he was on her level, Cooper
interrupted with his gravelly voice; "No, ma'am, I was out of line to
speak to you so offensively. I have a quick temper that sometimes gets the better
of me. I should be apologizing to you."

Hallie had been avoiding his gaze, but his
surprising admission made her glance quickly at him. His face was only inches
from hers, and she inhaled sharply, gnawing at her lower lip. Cooper stood
straight, again towering over her, and she let her eyes move up his chest to
his face. He smiled a lopsided grin. "So, ma'am, let's just put that
unpleasant experience behind us."

Numbly, Hallie nodded. Cooper surprised her on
every account. Sometimes he seemed as rough as a blasting sand storm and other
times, like now, he appeared as gentle as a mare nudging her foal in its first
steps. Relief flooded Hallie that he wasn't holding her mistake against her.
Glancing at his worn boots, she whispered, "Thank you."

Cooper took a step backward and she looked up to
one of his endearing half smiles. Tipping his hat again, he said, "I'll
see you later, Hallie," and walked away. He had only taken a couple of
steps when he turned back around with a boyish expression. "I was on the
deck last night because I was stargazing."

Because he was already walking away again, he didn't
see Hallie's smile.

Chapter 8:
Westport Bound

 

The
five days it took the
Mirabella
to reach Westport Landing, docking at
ports along the way to release and load passengers, cargo, and animals, were
days Hallie would later remember with fondness. Little did she realize just how
grueling the next five months of her life would become. During the steamboat
trip, she met other emigrants bound for her same wagon train under the leadership
of Captain Jeremiah J. Jones. Thomas had specifically chosen Captain Jones's
train because he was considered one of the finest and most experienced drivers
on the trail.

Hallie
soon came to realize that the majority of people headed west were families
seeking the promise of bountiful lands, beautiful streams teeming with all
manner of fish, and better lives for themselves and their children. Of course, scattered
amidst the families were businessmen hoping for successful ventures in the new
land and prospectors with gold fever.

During
her first day on the river, Hallie took inventory of her funds, and although
plentiful, her practical nature had her thinking about ways to become even more
frugal. While she had often chided Thomas on his tendency to overspend, she
would be forever grateful he'd purchased staterooms on the
Mirabella
. He
had saved her the harshness of having to sleep on the main deck without benefit
of a room or food. The poor women whose husbands were unable to afford first
class accommodations, looking haggard and bedraggled, did their best for their
families by preparing meals from their own goods and attempting to create
privacy by hanging blankets. Hallie felt guilty for having so much when others
had so little, and made a mental note to help others as occasions arose.

The
closer they came to Westport Landing, the more the banks of the river teemed
with emigrants camping alongside it until their wagon trains left. Most trains
left by the end of April, weather permitting. The spring grasses were
absolutely necessary for the grazing of livestock. Thomas had said that leaving
too early was as dangerous as leaving too late and taking the chance of being
caught in the winter snows.

Riffling
through her trunk, Hallie retrieved a sheet of writing paper, unpacked her ink
and quill, and began making lists of the items she would need to purchase. Because
prices were higher farther along the trail and the quality less, Cooper said they
would purchase everything in Westport.

After
a short time, her head started to spin with the immensity of what would be required—flour,
cornmeal, rice, sugar, coffee, tea, beans, hardtack, salt pork, tin plates and
cups, utensils, blankets, wash tub and scrub board, soap—and those were only a
few of the small items. The necessities on her large items and animals list included
a sturdy wagon and oxen, milk cow, chickens, tools, and that was just the
beginning.

Her
head pounding with anxiety, she set her writing aids aside and thought about
Thomas's calm demeanor—such a kind man. Tears of loneliness escaped her resolve
not to cry and dripped from her chin onto her lists. Sniffling, she did what
Thomas always suggested when life became too overwhelming; she closed her eyes,
breathed deeply, and envisioned the end from the beginning. She imagined a
homey cabin snuggled amidst tall trees and a bubbling creek filling the air
with happy, gurgling sounds. She envisioned a bend in the creek and, lifting
the skirt of a pretty blue calico dress, skipped around it, laughing…

Hallie's
eyes popped wide open.
Hallie, what are you thinking?
She had visualized
Cooper fishing with Timmy. When he glanced up and saw her, he handed his pole
to Timmy, opened his arms, and waited for her to run into them.

Wiping
the vision from her mind, Hallie jumped up, folded her list and stuffed it in
her reticule.
Foolish, foolish, woman,
she scolded herself.

Chapter
9:
Land Legs

 

The
Mirabella
docked at Westport Landing
in the midst of a downpour. Even so, travelers couldn't wait to depart the
ship, especially those who had been making due on the main deck. Standing under
the overhang of the promenade, Cooper glanced at Hallie, Timmy, and the
Hankersons. "Doesn't look like this weather is going to let up anytime
soon, but I'm sure the captain will be shooing us off his ship to prepare for
his return trip."

Hallie asked, "Where's Sweet Pea?"

Cooper responded, "I paid one of the older
boys of an emigrant family with a passel of kids—ten was my last count—to take
her to the closest stable and wait for me."

Hallie frowned. "I'm sure that's an expense
you hadn't planned on. I'll reimburse you after we're settled for the
day."

Cooper returned Hallie's frown and set his jaw
at a now recognizable, stubborn angle. "No, ma'am, I'll not take any money
for anything to do with my horse."

"But, Cooper–"

He interrupted; "Ma'am, Sweet Pea is
my
responsibility, and besides, you need everything you've got to outfit yourself
for this train."

Sammy glanced back and forth between the two of
them. "Aw, do we have to wait for Miz Hallie to buy a dress? We already
been standin' here since forever waitin' for the rain to let up."

For a second, the meaning of his words escaped
everyone's understanding, but when they realized he had misunderstood Cooper's
reference to Hallie "outfitting" herself, the group laughed, easing the
tension between them Hallie and Cooper.

While Emmett chuckled and lifted Sammy onto his
shoulders, Cooper motioned to two deck hands. "I'll direct these young
chaps in delivering your trunks to the dock and will meet ya'll under that blue
awning after I hire a buckboard." He pointed across the muddy wharf road to
the weathered façade and overhang of a store whose sign, hanging at a
precarious tilt, simply said, "Outfitter."

Having decided to continue her financial discussion
with Cooper later, Hallie opened her umbrella, acknowledged Cooper with a nod,
and grasped Timmy's hand to follow the Hankersons off the ship and across the
road.

* * *

Cooper watched Hallie's retreat. The diminutive woman
was certainly stubborn. He recognized the set of her shoulders brooked no
argument, but hell would freeze over before he'd allow her to shoulder expenses
for his horse. His first impression of her as a determined, although easily
manipulated woman, had been mightily disproved. From the look in her eyes, he
hadn't heard the last about her reimbursing him. He could only imagine her indignation
when he refused payment for his services at the end of the journey. When she'd
tried to pay him before leaving Jebson, he'd refused her money, pacifying her
by saying he wanted to be paid at the end of the trail, after he earned his fee
He chuckled because he knew holy hell was going to break loose at that
encounter.

Most people considered him to be as poor as a church
mouse, which suited him just fine. In reality, he'd saved over the years and
made a few wise investments, but gambling winnings constituted the bulk of his
money. And because of the condition of the farm he'd purchased, the money
forked out hadn't set him back much at all.

Cooper's amusement faded however when he
remembered the reason for his generosity to Hallie. He knew she would want an
explanation and he wasn't sure he wanted to admit his failure as a husband and father.

Oh, Jake, I wish I'd been the kind of man your
ma could've counted on, even if she couldn't love me. I wish I'd been around to
see you grow up."

Regret washed over Cooper more powerfully than the
sudden watershed from the dreary clouds. When Marybeth had told him she wanted
a divorce, he'd laughed. Divorce simply wasn't done. Once a man was married, he
was married for good. He'd changed his mind, however, but it wasn’t her tears
and pleas that did it; it was walking in on her in bed with the local banker.
He'd almost killed the bastard, but Marybeth's shrieks and determination to
protect him with her own body made Cooper realize something—she truly loved the
gray-haired banker with his handlebar mustache. In fact, the man's own attempt
to protect Marybeth at the cost of his own life was another jolt for Cooper—the
banker loved Marybeth just as vehemently. After that, there was no way they could
stay married. Hell, he hadn’t been a good husband or father anyway, what with leaving
for long periods to drive herds of longhorns along the Shawnee Trail from Texas
to Missouri. Although he always cared for the practical needs of his family,
emotionally, he hadn't been there for them.

As for Jake, he loved the boy, but didn’t know
how to be a father, having been abandoned himself at the age of six by a
prostitute mother and raised by an uncle who already had ten kids he liked to
beat the daylights out of, with Cooper being his new favorite.

When Cooper turned twenty and met Marybeth, a
pretty, black-headed gal with a voluptuous figure, he was smitten by lust…and
then love. Her being five years older didn’t bother him at all. In fact, it
added to her allure. She'd been married in her teens and widowed at the age of
twenty-two. To her sadness, she'd had no children with her first husband and
desperately wanted them. Cooper was more than happy to oblige, but never having
had a father, he soon felt weighted with the responsibility and found himself
on the range often. All Marybeth ever wanted was a loving family, and when he
thought about it later, he understood her unfaithfulness. The banker was
everything Cooper wasn't.

That nasty encounter was the epiphany he needed
to give his wife her freedom. Lowering the gun he'd threatened Marybeth and the
banker with, he said, "Marybeth, you can have your divorce." After
that, he stayed long enough to sign the papers and say goodbye to Jake. Never
having spent much time with his father, the three-year-old lifted a chubby hand
to wave goodbye and then went back to playing with his wooden horse in the
dirt. That was his last memory of his son. His boy was turning fifteen in a few
days and Cooper wasn't the reckless young man he had once been. But it was too
late for him and his boy.

Jake was the reason Cooper couldn't accept
payment for helping Hallie. In some strange way, helping Hallie and Tim was atonement
for the fiasco he had created with Marybeth and Jake. Maybe it didn't make
sense, but most of his life hadn't made sense.

Cooper returned his thoughts to the present.
Nope,
Hallie, you can fight me tooth and nail, but I won't take a dime of your money.

Acquiring a buckboard and loading the trunks
took quite some time, what with everyone and his brother attempting to do the
same thing, but finally, Cooper located the livery, retrieved Sweet Pea and
tied her to the back of the buckboard, and then pulled to the front of the
Outfitters store where Tim and Emmett leaned against the siding and Lydia and
Sammy sat on a bench. He didn't see Hallie.

"Whoa!" he called to the horses, pulling
them in front of an adjoining business—a dining room with grimy windows and a
lopsided sign tacked near the door that advertised,
Special of the Day—Meatloaf
and Tators,
looking like it had been scrawled years earlier. He jumped off
the buckboard, looped the reins around the hitching post, and walked toward the
store. The Hankersons and Tim met him on the boardwalk.

Tim grinned, the gaping hole of his missing
tooth the first thing anyone saw when talking to the boy. "Howdy Mr. Jerome;
Ma's in the store checking on supplies."

Cooper almost groaned aloud. He sure hoped the
woman wasn't making any purchases. This would be the last place he'd buy
necessities—its worn down condition and location making the supplies
questionable and the prices exorbitant.

Cooper tipped his hat. "I best check on your
ma." He quickly stepped around the boy. Inside the store, he found her
engaged in conversation with a greasy geezer who looked to be older than God.
He heard her say, "So, Mr. Tucker, you're telling me that you've got the
best prices anywhere in the area?"

The old man jawed his tobacco and turned to spit
the black stuff in a rusty spittoon. "Yep, little lady, that's what I'm
sayin'."

Cooper interrupted. "Er, Hallie, the trunks
are loaded and we're ready to leave."

Hallie jumped at his voice and he almost
grinned. What was it about him that always startled her?

She acknowledged his presence with, "Thank
you, Cooper, I'll be right there." She turned back to the old sidewinder.
"I'll keep your words in mind, Mr. Tucker."

Not wanting to lose a sale, the questionable
shopkeeper pointedly directed his words at Hallie, not Cooper, "So, what
can I do fer ya in the way of supplies?"

Speaking crisply, Hallie responded, "Like I
said, sir, I will keep you in mind." She turned, whisked past Cooper, and
said under her breath, "Lying old dog."

Cooper coughed, covered his mouth to hide his
smile, and followed Hallie out the door.

* * *

After a half hour's wait, the rain let up enough
for them to climb onto the buckboard. Shaking water off the tarp covering their
trunks and making the best of a wet situation, the Hankersons and Timmy sat in
the bed of the wagon. Cooper assisted Hallie to the front of the buckboard and
easily spanned her waist with his large hands. Hallie sucked a breath when his
touch seemed to linger a might longer than necessary, but then she decided she
was just imagining it. In her mind, Cooper was the kind of man who went for
tall, buxom women, probably saloon gals, not timid, plain, skinny, country
women. Again, she chastised herself for letting her mind wander. Why her
thoughts kept drifting into forbidden areas, she had no idea. She turned her
attention to what Cooper was saying.

"I asked around and found out there's a
decent hotel in the heart of town. Also, we'll probably want to shop prices on
supplies. After I get you and Tim settled in the hotel, I'll start making
inquiries about oxen and a wagon." He lowered his voice. "Um, excuse
me if I’m being indiscreet, but are we still working with the same availability
of funds you divulged to me in Jebson, ma'am?"

Hallie lowered her own voice. "Oh, yes, of
course. I have four thousand dollars from the sale of my farm and another
thousand remaining in savings after Thomas purchased our land in Oregon."

Cooper nodded. "That relieves my mind. I
think I'll be able to outfit you very well and get your cabin built in Oregon."

Hallie leaned closer and said softly,
"Please don't forget your wages, sir. Whatever you would have profited on
the sale of your crops…and a little more, should be fair."

Hallie got the feeling Cooper was amused when he
responded, "Yes, ma'am." But he sounded serious when he continued,
"You know, a woman running a farm alone is risky business."

Hallie sighed. "Yes, I realize that, but as
I explained during our initial meetings, because of his disability, my husband was
unable to do the manual labor associated with planting and harvesting, so we
hired hands specifically for those tasks. Because we paid them well, they did
an excellent job. And except for one year with inclement weather, we always
made a tidy profit come harvest time. My husband was a very astute planner and
I was prudent with our funds. And if there's one thing I know how to do, it’s
farm. So, having said all that, I have no doubt I can continue that same
practice. I have enough funds to keep me going until the first harvest and
possibly beyond. Of course, I realize there are always unknowns in any
equation, but I must fortify my courage and continue on. Farming is what I know
and what I love. So please, Mr. Jerome, do not trouble yourself on my account."

She heard Cooper puff a breath and decided to
change the subject. Turning to look at his profile, she asked a question that
had been on her mind for some time. "Cooper, I'd like to ask you
something."

He faced her. "Shoot."

His response made her smile. "You always
call my son Tim, never Timmy, like everyone else. I was just wondering
why."

Cooper studied her eyes for a second and then
returned his gaze to the road. Maneuvering the reins, he guided the horses
around a bend before responding. When he did, his answer surprised her.

"Well, Hallie, I'll tell you why, but you
may not like what I have to say."

Hallie furrowed her forehead, then said hesitantly,
"Please continue."

Cooper readjusted his hat, which sent splashes
of water onto the floorboard and sprinkles across Hallie's skirt. Finally, he spoke.
"Your boy may be young, Hallie, but he's havin' to grow up fast. Calling
him Timmy is like…well…not lettin' him grow up…like keepin' him a toddler. Now the
name Tim, it's a man's name, something your boy is going to become faster
because of losin' his pa." Cooper paused, and Hallie saw him glance at her
profile and then back at the road. "I hope you understand what I'm trying to
say. I don't mean any offense."

Hallie fingered a tear, turning so that Cooper
could only see the back of her head. When she felt like her voice wouldn't
tremble, she looked straight ahead again and replied, "I do understand.
Thank you for telling me. I'm going to ponder your words and talk to
Timmy…" she smiled slightly, "…Tim …about what you've said."

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