Few Things Left Unsaid (18 page)

We left our houses at around 7pm. We all decided to meet outside the bar.Sameer, Anup and Swapnil were already there. They were waiting for me. I reached within 15 min and we entered the bar. We ordered two beers and snacks. The waiter poured beer in my glass.First glass of beer in my life. I was afraid about the consequences. Should I or shouldn’t I? I was confused. However, I wanted to enjoy the end of the one year in Engineering.

“Cheers” everyone said loudly.

“Cheers to the end of  one year” Anup added.

First, sip of beer. It had an awful taste. I did not like it at all.Immeditely after drinking I had a few nuts. Everyone was looking at me.

“Relax. I am drinking.dont worry. I am stable. It’s just one sip till now.” We exchanged smiles.

College is like a fountain of knowledge – and the students are there to drink. We were doing the same. We ordered two more beers. One more glass. My eyes started rolling and the body was slowly losing control over the mind. I was still enjoying it. Partially stable. I was enjoying college life. Beer in one hand and cigarette in the other. Smoke all over. I was losing my senses as the glass emptied.

“Waiter, 2 more beers and a full chicken  tandoori.” Swapnil ordered.

“Hey it’s enough. I will lose my senses.” I said to everyone keeping my eyes wide open.

“Oh common Aadi...have just one more glass. Then you don’t drink.” Everyone forced me. One more glass full along with 2 pieces of tandoori for munching. I took a bite of tandoori and sipped beer. Sipped again. And it continued. I was over with that glass too in about 30 minutes. I lit a cigarette. I was totally out of control.

“Aadi... remember what Riya had said. Don’t drink too much. You promised her.” Sameer was shaking my body saying this.

“Please let me relax. I am drunk. I am losing control. I want to puke.” I was about to sleep on the table itself.

“Aadi shall I call Riya and tell her what you are doing.” Sameer was angry.

“Hey Sameer, mind your own business. You can’t blackmail me by taking Riya’s name. I do not care. Do whatever you want.”

Sameer called Riya. He told Riya everything that was happening.Riya called me on my cell in 5minutes.

“Hey, jaan….what you want. Why are you calling me? You trust Sameer. However, you can’t trust me. I am not too drunk. I am still stable. Don’t worry.” I almost slept…

She said something which I couldn’t hear. The phone slipped from my hand and I slept.Sameer tried to wake me up.Anup brought some lemon to put in my mouth. They took me out of the bar. I sat on the footpath.

“Are you an idiot? How were you talking to Riya.” Swapnil shouted.

“Who are you to say this? She is my girlfriend. What you want to do? Do you also love her? Do you also want her?” this time I did not know what I was saying. The words were just coming out.

Bang. Sameer slapped me hard on my face. I fell down on footpath. Sameer did not like what I had said few minutes back. The day was over. I do not remember anything after that. It was end of the 1
^st
year and my first drinking session.

1 year in engineering was like a piece of cake. I met new friends, we enjoyed ourselves, I met my life partner. Now I was waiting for the  second year to begin. I wished it would be the same as first year.

       
2
^ND
YEAR – LIFE IS NOT THE SAME

                                           I
t was not a happy start to second year. When I went to see the notice board to check divisions and roll numbers I realised Riya would no longer be in my class. This means we could only meet in the break. I had come late to college.Riya was already attending her lecture. She had messaged me. I went near my classroom. When I peeped into the classroom, there were all new faces. My eyes searched for Riya. I entered the class after first lecture. I stared continuously at third row but Riya was not there. The whole first year I used to watch her during lectures. I took my mobile and gave her a missed call. Again my eyes went to the third row.Riya used to look back whenever I used to give a missed call. I was missing everything. I was missing all the moments that we shared in 1
^st
year. This was painful. I messaged her. She could not reply. Maybe she would be sitting on the first bench. This upset me more. I wanted to see her at least. Since morning, I had not called her nor I had seen her. This was not the morning I wished for. It was not what I wanted. I wanted her. I enjoyed engineering because she was with me. Now what?

I got a message from her.

Where are you bacchaa.Did you reach college. I am in lecture. Meet you in break time
.

I replied immediately

Miss you jaan. My eyes are staring at third row. I can’t see you.
:(

I was waiting for her reply but she did not. How was I going to sit in this classroom? How could I attend lectures? How could I concentrate? How could I laugh during lectures? Each question revolved around Riya. We were separated. We did not like it but we had to put up with it. I was not comfortable with all the new faces. There was no Swapnil nor was Anup there. They were in I.T. Riya was with them. Even Sameer was not there with me. This made lectures tougher actually hell.

I was looking at my watch. Time was passing like a small baby crawling on the road. Each hour seemed like months… I was not used to this. Maybe I was used to Riya.Her smile, her sweet look, and her messages. I enjoyed all these things during the lectures. Everything was missing. I was alone.

I called Riya as the professor left the class. It was 1:30pm. Break time. Riya didn’t pick the call. This was enough. I went near her class on third floor. Mine was on second. The lecture was still going on. This time every minute was like hours… after 5 minutes her lecture got over. I ran into the class .Swapnil and Riya were sitting together. I was not able to see Anup anywhere. I did not care. I wanted my sweetheart beside me. I sat beside her. We both had tears in our eyes. It was afternoon and we had not even seen each other. We hadn’t even called each other.

“I missed you jaan. I really missed all the things we did in the first year. I missed your looking back at me. I missed your smile. I missed your messages. Those missed calls. This is tough jaan. I want you. How can I survive in that class? It kills me.” I was holding her hands tight.

“Even I missed you. I missed your naughty smiles and your small things. I Even looked back a few times but found you nowhere. Love you. Let’s eat Tiffin. I have brought your favorite rice.”

She put a spoonful of rice in my mouth. I smiled.

“Hey Swapnil  , where is Anup. I missed you people. The first year was superb. It’s going to be difficult for me now.” I said to Swapnil  .

“He has gone with his friend. Some work maybe. I don’t know. Even we will miss you. Especially Riya. She is upset since morning. Take her out somewhere.” Swapnil patted her back

Sameer came shouting.

“Hey guys, the result is displayed. Let’s go and check it.”

We all were tense. Even sem results always bring a sense of apprehension. We were not confident about our results. We left the class immediately and reached the library where the result was displayed. Sameer somehow went near the board. We asked him to look for our names too. He came out of that rush and seemed to be upset.

“What happened? Did you check the result?” I asked him. We all were looking at him.

“Yes, I have. I got 4 kt  in 2
^nd
semester and 1 kt in 1
^st
semester. I am dropped for a year.” He almost cried.

This made our hearts pump abruptly. I could not believe Sameer wasdropped. I searched for my name in 1
^st
semester result. I had passed. Even Riya had passed. Swapnil had also passed. Anup got 1 kt. I still could not look for my name on 2
^nd
semester result. I was really tense because of Sameer's result. I saw my name. 1 kt. MATHS 2.I could not believe. I was good in maths. I had scored 95 marks in HSC and 68 in maths 1. I had written maths 2 paper well enough to pass. However, it showed fail.Mumbai Univerrsity- Totally unpredictable.

I saw Riya’s result. She got 1 kt BEE. Swapnil had passed. Anup had also passed. I came out and went to Sameer.

“Hey Sameer don’t worry, we will do something. Just chill.” I consoled him.

“I cannot believe it. I have failed. My papers were not that bad. I have scored in 30s. University sucks yaar. They don’t show any kindness towards students. This is the most sucking university.” Sameer said it in frustration.

“Don’t worry. You give your papers for rechecking. Something will happen.” Riya said to Sameer.

We went home. We bunked the classes.My parents were happy with my result. I was officially in 2
^nd
year. Mom was also happy. I still could not believe I got kt in maths 2.But maybe Sameer was right. University sucks.

Dad gave me permission to take my Honda Activa to college. It was boring going by train. One’s own vehicle was always better. Even Riya’s parents were ready to purchase a new two-wheeler. She wanted Scooty Pep. She asked me which colour would look nice. My answer was red. My favourite. Red hot and spicy girl on a red innocent and sweet Scooty Pep. We both were happy about our results. The only thing that was killing me was that I could not be with Riya during the lectures.

Second year electronics. A jail in my college. It was the worst branch in our college. Seniors always used to warn us about this. Moreover, they also warned us about one professor who was very strict. Shinde sir. He taught electronic design. ECAD 1.  The subject is also very complicated. Seniors told us to attend maximum lectures of Shinde sir.

Shinde sir entered the classroom. He was not very tall. He was on the shorter side. Formally dressed, a file in his hand and he entered as if he was the king of the college. Everybody stood up as he entered the class. He had a beer belly. Except beer belly, he was perfect. He started taking attendance as he entered the class.

“I won’t manipulate the attendance at the end of semester. So attend maximum lectures. At least 75%. Those who have lower than 75% won’t be allowed to make their final submissions. The rest is up to you. So let’s start with the subject.” He said.

It made me think twice. His voice had such an impact that there was pin drop silence in the entire classroom. No one uttered a single word throughout his entire lecture. He finished teaching and left the classroom. For 1 hour, he did not even smile a bit. No doubt he taught us well. The best I had seen so far since last year. Nevertheless, he would kick our asses if we were not regular. I met Riya. I told her about Shinde sir. She did not react. She also knew this was an important lecture.

“Riya, shall I tell you one serious thing. I am thinking about it for the last few days.” I said to her while walking in the campus.

“What, any problem?” Riya stared at me.

“No problem as such. However, I think we should concentrate on our studies now. It’s the second year. Now that we are into this fucking engineering, let’s do it seriously. We cant look back now; before it is too late, let us study hard. What you think, I am not saying we will stop meeting or anything like that but about studies.”

“I think you are right. Even I was thinking the same way. However, I cannot live without meeting you or spending some time with you. Please do not tell me all these things. I can do anything else.”

Even I could not live without holding her hands and spending some time with her. We decided to be regular and start studying regularly. I was more regular than Riya. We used to meet in the break, before college and after college. We used to be together after college for hour or so and then we used to go home. But things changed. Earlier I used to bunk my last lecture and meet her. But now I would not be able to do this. Our head of department changed our timetable and he shifted Shinde sir’s lecture from 5pm to 6pm. This made my life worse. I used to come in the morning to college as there were practicals now I had to attend till 6. I told Riya about this. She was upset but did not say anything. I convinced her by saying that I would meet her after college until 7pm and then go home. She agreed.